After 71 years of living, three decisions I’ve made about life
After more than a year of pandemic lockdowns, many senior citizens are having a rough time. Isolation has increased loneliness, diminished health, and fueled depression. But in the wake of celebrating my 71st birthday, even after a year of Covid lockdown, I’m glad to report my world looks bright.
But my world does look different, and I’m certain that would be true even without Covid-19. I’m convinced older folks have gained some insight into life that hasn’t dawned on younger folks. Maybe that’s because some lessons are learned best through experience.
Here are three conclusions experience is leading me to embrace.
Today is the day!
Younger people are tempted to sacrifice today for the promises of tomorrow. Older people may bury today under happy memories or heavy regret. I’m seeing that either perspective is dangerous.
“This is the day that the Lord has made.” It’s the only day I can manage. God has forgiven me for all those past mistakes, and he’s promised me provision for my future. Today I can make him Lord, seek his will, demonstrate his grace, speak a word of his truth, point someone else toward him.
I may dream about or remember a wider opportunity to influence. I may be unsatisfied with limitations that prevent me from doing more. But today I will encounter at least someone to encourage or teach or help. Even if I don’t see anyone, I can call someone, or write or text or email. And I can pray.
Marjorie Reeves Miller was a dynamo when I knew her at Standard Publishing. She moved from one department to another in the years I worked with her there: creating new products, finding new authors, leading new ways to serve the local church. She worked, sacrificed, and innovated. And then she retired.
My last memory of her was years after that, visiting beside her nursing home bed, to tell her how much I appreciated her and her example. She had a health care aide with her most of each day, and she told me she was talking with that woman about Jesus.
Marge didn’t waste a day. She knew what I’m beginning to experience: Any day is too precious to squander.
The balance is positive!
Every life has gains and losses, of course, and my life has had its share of each. But a realistic look at the whole picture proves to me that “thanks” should be my mantra.
Yes, my wife and I have had health problems, but we’ve had access to excellent healthcare. And in spite of necessary tune-ups or accommodations, my engine is still chugging along nicely.
Yes, I can tell you some foods my aging digestive system no longer processes well, but our pantry is always full, and our meals are always pleasant. In a world where starvation is rampant, I’ve never ever been really hungry.
Yes, I have a list of places I’d love to visit, sights I’d love to see, concerts I’d like to hear, productions I’d like to witness; and I know I won’t get to most of them. But that list is not longer than the catalog I could create of all God has allowed me to witness, here and around the world. And I’m living surrounded by beauty.
My life is full of gifts both “good” and “perfect,” and I must remember each of them has come to me “from the Father of the heavenly lights.” Yes, change is all around me, but as the Scripture reminds us, in him “there is no variation or shadow due to change.” What could be better?
Relationships are key!
In the last few weeks, now that we’re fully vaccinated, my wife and I have been back to church. Last week we attended a delightful reception honoring a retired minister and attended by more than a hundred whose life he’d touched. Again and again, these experiences have allowed us to reconnect with Christian friends we hadn’t seen in too many months. It’s hard to describe the warm rush of satisfaction that has come with each hug or fist bump.
And, of course, in some ways our experience is not unique. The media is full of pictures and commentary about the natural pressure people feel to be together. But I’ve learned it’s about more than simply sharing a meal or a laugh. We need to invest the time that will create ways to experience and express all those “one another” directives in the New Testament.
As my wife and I have navigated unforeseen bends in our road, we’ve been blessed with Christian friends who take seriously the commands to “serve one another” (Galatians 5:13), “seek good for one another” (1 Thessalonians 5:15), “accept one another” (Romans 15:7), “bear one another’s burdens” (Galatians 6:2), “speak truth to one another” (Ephesians 4:25), “stimulate one another to love and good deeds” (Hebrews 10:24), “be hospitable to one another” (1 Peter 4:9), and “pray for one another” (James 5:16).
And we must include family members under this heading. One of my friends again and again has said, “With your children, the relationship is what matters.” Not agreement on every decision or position or preference. Our love and support for each other are more important than any particular choice. How grateful we are for the presence of our children in our lives!
Maybe you don’t need to be older to experience each of these truths. I wish I had understood them better before now. But today is as soon as I can do anything new. The beauty and opportunity of the new is always available to every one of us, and that’s true whether you’re 71—or 17!
Photos by Metin Ozer and Jon Tyson on Unsplash
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