The Courage to Restore
The longer the disagreement existed, the more difficult it became to get things done. Maybe it was stubbornness. Maybe it was conflict avoidance. But eventually, when I realized what the problem was, I challenged these two men to talk and work it out for the good of the whole. And once they did, the business experienced a season of flourishing. And the gossip, the infighting, and the taking sides began to fade away.
I learned this important lesson during my early years as a therapist when I was called into various businesses and organizations to help them solve “business” problems. What I quickly discovered was the these business problems often weren’t business problems but rather relationship and communication problems.
While we don’t know the particulars of the issues or conflict that Euodia and Syntyche had in their relationship, apparently it had come to Paul’s attention, and he wrote a letter to the church, not so much to criticize but to ask the believers in Philippi to help these two come to some agreement in the Lord. Paul noted that the two had labored side by side with him and with others. But for some reason, there was tension between the two, and for their spiritual health and the health of the church, the conflict needed to be resolved.
Paul was no stranger to experiencing conflict. He had a lot of conflict with believers who knew his former self and at first were unsure of his motives or didn’t believe that he had truly changed. Paul also knew firsthand that when there is division in the body, then the work of Christ is hindered. He wrote in many places that it is important for the church to be united in mind, in purpose, and in love.
The best way to address conflict is not by pointing out the problems in others. What we must do is do prayerful evaluation of our own hearts and minds to see if we are creating disruption or disunity in the places we work, live, and worship. Once we have addressed our own selfishness and pride, then we can be useful in assisting others who may be out of harmony with each other.
Paul’s instructions from Galatians 6 are helpful in addressing those who struggle with various issues, including things they may be doing that disrupt the life of the church.
“Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted.”
When seeking to help another we must:
First, check our hearts and repent of issues in our own lives.
Second, we pray for God’s Spirit to guide us.
Third, we keep watch on ourselves so that arrogance, pride, or other temptations do not rise up. If they do, then we are likely not the ones to help the struggling brother or sister.
Finally, the help we offer must be given with a spirit of gentleness.
Father, we ask that you show us the relationships we need to restore. We ask that you transform our minds that we might grow in our faith and be available to help others in need. Make us one just as Jesus prayed that we would become. In Jesus’ name, amen.
Your Time with God’s Word
Philippians 4:1-3; Galatians 6:1 ESV
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